Insight, tips, & must haves for Expectant Twin Moms
Sep 19, 2021
A twin mom post
to:expectant twin moms
From:me, a twin mom two years in and still winging it as I
go.
I’m no expert and any true advice you need can come from a
medical professional. But once you enter twin mom world many will come to you
for tips/insight/perspective when they are expecting twins for the first time
or know someone who is expecting twins. So, this is a place that I’ll share my
perspective, some frequently asked questions, and things I wish I had read when
I was pregnant with our twins. Feel free to send me any follow up questions or FAQs I should add via DM over on my Instagram @rootsoutwest.
This post is PART ONE – to read while expecting. I’ll write a post on PART TWO – bringing home twins (for a look at my perspective of the early
newborn days with twins and postpartum).
Backstory on us – our twins just turned two as I am writing this. They are were our first pregnancy / kids – so it felt like we were jumping headfirst into
parenting with absolutely no roadmap on what to expect… At first that felt like
a drawback, and it did indeed have its drawbacks with not knowing what to
expect first hand of the hospital experience, breast feeding and such..but overall, I think it
ended up being a positive thing, because we had nothing to compare to and didn’t
truly know how much work two were compared to one. We could imagine but we didn’t
actually know.
“I don’t know
how you do it with twins”-
This
is a common phrase people say to us. I always reply with – “As parents we are all doing the
same tasks - everything just takes us a lot longer and is much louder”.
Because it’s true, we are all changing diapers, feeding babies, caring for
their needs…but we have to do two at once or let one cry while we cater to the
other. And while it’s heavy on a mama’s heart, it’s often unavoidable. There were
plenty of times that it made me feel bad for me or for my baby that was left to
cry while I changed the other’s diaper. It’s easy to fall into the mindset of –
well moms of singletons get to care for their baby’s needs immediately and
theirs don’t have to cry as much. And while this may be true, it's not necessarily the case for every singleton mom & it’s definitely not the
reality for a twin mom. So, it’s better for your mindset to know you’re not
alone in thinking that as a twin mom, but to squash those thoughts as often as you
can when they come.
How will I carry two
babies for 40 weeks?
Well, first of all, my doctor was only going to let me carry
for 38 weeks. When you’re expecting twins your body is often measuring 4 weeks
ahead of the week you are actually on. And as someone who was carrying twins
for her first pregnancy, I kept thinking…how is this going to work? Am I going
to look like a torpedo? I spent a lot of time consuming “bumpdates” online –
posts written by bloggers to give monthly updates on what was happening in
their pregnancy at that time. I didn’t find many twin ones at the time, but I
did write some of my own, you can find them all here –
At week 32 I ended up having some high blood pressure issues.
It was also July and hot as heck outside. So, the girls were almost born on the
4th of July, but luckily we got it under control and I just had to
spend the weekend in the hospital to be monitored. I did get put on modified
bed rest at the end of week 33 –
basically I had to lounge at home and couldn’t go to work. I thought I’d go
stir crazy, but really I had no energy and was making frequent doctor visits
for non-stress tests, so it really wasn’t that bad.
How many weeks were you when you delivered your twins?
We ended up delivering at 36 weeks.
Here is a picture from
the day I went to the hospital to deliver our twins.
Baby showers - my tip = have these around 25 weeks.
If you are blessed with baby showers, my tip would be to plan them around 25 weeks or so. With twins, you never know when they will truly arrive. I was due in August, so I knew with the heat I wanted mine as early as possible so I would be able to move around more easily and not be at a point where I'd be super uncomfortable.
This was taken at the end of my last shower. I was about 28 weeks here.
Middle of the night feedings.
Goodness. It's truly amazing how little sleep parents can function on in those newborn days. Some sort of special adrenaline I guess... For these, our living room was my hub. Our living room is right off of the nursery so this was an easy space to use and allow for me to cater to each baby at once, solo. We didn't have a basinett., our babies slept in their cribs and then I'd bring them to the living room after I changed them both to have their feedings. I'd make two bottles (bless the Baby Breeza for speed), get the babies changed, and into the living room to feed. I'd have both boppy loungers & burp clothes already set up and stationed in the living room for the middle of the night feedings. I would prop my legs on our ottoman and then have one baby on my lap and one beside me on the couch, then I could feed both babies a bottle at once and be somewhat comfortable. I also found a simple TV tray to be VERY handy for these feedings. I could easily move it around and store it away when I didn't need it.
Lots of night lights & a portable rechargeable light were middle of the night purchases I made right after having the twins. I quickly realized I needed more dimmable, soft light options.
Feeding two babies on the go, solo.
This is tricky solo. We bottle fed our twins and if I was going anywhere solo (even just for grocery pick up, etc) I had to think through A LOT of logistics. I would pack one boppy lounger pillow with me so that I could set it on the passenger seat and then when I was parked and needing to feed both babies, I could have both up front with me. This worked well for a while until they got a little bigger and squirmier (3 months maybe..?). I could also sit in places like the Target dressing room and have each baby in our Joovy Twin Roo and be sitting + facing each baby & feeding bottles.
Monthly milestone pictures.
We used this milestone twin blanket each month. Cute, simple & affordable. Also, don't do these alone. Just don't. Trust me. It's loud, everyone is sweating, it's a lot of work to try to manage solo. I did it once or twice then vowed to never again do them solo, it's much quicker with help - & easier on your sanity.
What must-have items
do I need to register for for twins?
We used this stroller the entire time our twins were in infant seats. It was great for doctors visits or any public outting. We bought these adapters for the brand of our carseats. I loved that it was relatively inexpensive and that I could sit and be facing both of our babies when out and needing to tend to them.
This thing is pure
magic and so worth it for twins if you end up using formula. I’d recommend
registering for it, or at least using your registry completion discount on it
to save some money. We left it in the box until we knew if we would end up
using formula, that way we could return it if we didn’t need it. We started
using it about a month in because we were supplementing with formula from day
one. It looks like this one is currently out of stock at Target, - but you can also find it on BuyBuyBaby here, this one is fancier than ours is or you can find them on Amazon.
we
have a small nursery so we bought mini cribs to save on space for our twins. We have these in white. They still transition to a toddler bed and at two they are still using these.
Granted now they are getting to be about the same length as the crib when they
lay down, so we will outgrow them before too long. But if you have a small
space, I recommend these.
Two of these! We used these A TON and they are reasonably priced for a twin mom needing two. These were perfect for docking one baby while you held the other. I could rock it with y foot and keep both babies content. We never even ended up using the vibrate function but we used these from about 1 month to 12 months. I would use for post bath time when I would need to lay one baby down while switching to wash+dry the other. It was extra handy in that scenario. But also perfect for front porch sitting, feeding on the go or in a different spot, and just hanging out.
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